WWJD? Ouiji Board

The WWJD? craze has taken the country by storm, along with the insuing licensing, marketing, and upselling. This crass materialism has had a dampening effect on the original sentiment, leaving many of the faithful wondering, "Hell, what WOULD Jesus do?"

To take the guesswork out of your questioning, we present the WWJD? WeeJee board, ('ouiji' is a Hasbro trademark). Use your computer mouse as the planchette. Hold a question in your mind, and alone, or with another, let the mouse wander where it will. The planchette (mouse) must remain over a letter for 2 or more seconds to take effect. Put your planchette (mouse) over Jesus' face to get a 'space.' Sometime answers are slow in coming, so remember that patience is a virtue.