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March 2004 | March Madness
37 "Bible Believing" Tricks Anyone Can Use to Prove God Agrees with Them, Miss Poppy Dixon
Contrary to what you might think, it's not necessary to read the Bible to discuss it. In fact, reading the Bible may only confuse you, and you need to be absolutely 100% certain of your position. Remember, your degree of certainty is directly correlated to the truth value of your argument.
Read more...
NEW & IMPROVED! "Write To Life" Protest Letter Generator
For your convenience Adult Christianity has compiled the most common responses to our Abortion is Not a Sin webpage. Just click on the sentiments that best reflect your position. Test your ideas for originality. Use the UPPER CASE option [UC] if what you're adding is EXTRA true. Use our SpellChucker TM program to add spelling errors and typos for increased realism!
It's Passion Mania!!!
Get your crucifix lollipop rings here, now in FIVE great flavors!
Miss Poppy was so moved by "The Passion" that she created the Home Version of the Crucifixion Gift Basket which includes an action figure of Jesus that you can torture for yourself! (Fake blood included) at MissPoppy.com.
Check out our new Easter line.
New case discount on HandzOff Antimasturbatory Gum!
Just in time for Easter at Café Press
The "tIHS Happens" product line! The text "IHS" is commonly posted above the crucifix in Christian art works, signifying, in a very convoluted way, the initials of the Savior's Greek nickname. (Christians back then weren't any more straightforward than they are today.) "tIHS Happens" provides us with a more philosophic perspective on the sadomasochistic torture of the Christ.
This Month in The Pearly Gates
Christian Nudity Exposed at Naturalist Resort. Christian Clown school for the more modest among you who would rather keep your clothes, but check your dignity at the door. A new category for those who "get it right."
Christian News | March 2004
Priest's Child Porn Stash, Mel Gibson's Wife Going Straight to Hell, Christian School Rifle Range, More Million Dollar Bilkings, Jesus at Nascar, Pastor "Helps" Wife Down Flight of Stairs, Con Artist Blames Holy Spirit, Is Faith Caused by Brain Damage? Bloody Jelly Beans, Second Grader Damns Classmate to Hell, American Airlines Missionary, and as always..., much, much more.
Remember to spread the love - forward this newsletter to all of your friends and enemies.
For Christ's sake,
PS Write to me, or comment on the News articles on the home page. I love hearing from you.
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